Still Learning to let go ..

If you are reading my blog you are either a parent of a child with a learning disability or working with children in this area.  In this case you will understand why I am writing about learning to let go.  For all the years we have been protecting, advocating and trying to find a way to make innovative roads to help our children, there comes the time to let go.  Actually I want to correct myself, this is learning how to educate everyone else on the information you have discovered and need to tell people, so they can treat your child correctly.  When I write those words it brings tears to my eyes.  As parents we love our children so much that we will do anything to help correct what our children were born with, it's our love driven goal.  No one can understand this but a parent who deals with this on a day to day basis.  This gets so ingrained in our nature, that when it comes time to let go, we are afraid.  Yes, AFRAID.  I finally said it, I'm afraid to let go for fear the world will crush my child.  As you all know I am a parent of an 18 year old daughter that will be leaving for college.  Although she left last year for her 5th year of high school ( a great school Thames Academy connected to Mitchell College), she had supervision.  She graduated and now will be solo in her first year.  The apprehension and fear is starting to get into my body.  Alone, with one roommate, will she go to class, who will tell her she has to get up, will someone be after her for her homework.  All the questions go through my head, and my soul.  My head tells me, you have given her all the tools for success, you have guided her down this path so she can succeed.  My heart is a whole other story, will someone take advantage of her, will she breakdown, will she be afraid, I'm not there what do I do?
On a whim the other day I saw a friend on facebook, she was friends with a woman who read tarot cards.  Now I was curious, just to be curious.  Sometimes I have all this apprehension on what people read, but I saw that she was a good friend of a friend, so I made an appointment.  I went into this lovely office, pleasant, serene, and waited.  Okay I prepared myself for a very general reading, I was very skeptical.  It was my time, a very nice lady accompanied me into a serene room, quiet, peaceful, and I did my shuffling and cutting of the deck.  She started to read to me about myself, okay she was on target, giving me information and even confirming issues, really nothing about my children.  At the end she asked if I had questions, I said, "you never mentioned my children?".  She explained that if the children are adults they don't show up as much, but younger children do, so I shuffled again,  She looked at the cards and looked at me.."It's time to let go, the cards want you to know this message, you have done such a good job on your children that it's time to let your daughter go and do what she is meant to do." " Your son will blossom and really come into his own, let him do this".  I just looked at her and said "They both have learning disabilities, I have to see this through".  She looked at me with this pleasant smile and said " the universe acknowledges that you have done a good job, now it's time for you".  Wow, I had tears in my eyes and thought, it's time I let my daughter go.  She was right, it's her time, she has to use all the tools I gave her, I'll always be here for her to call and ask questions to but it's her journey.  For my son, well she was right, he has become quite a character, tall, skinny, big head of hair and a hat he never takes off.  He has a ways to go but truly he is having fun.
So I'm still learning to let go, maybe this was the universe trying to tell me IT'S TIME!